Look, we're not about to say that sitting there on live TV and filling the 400 hours of content that they seem to have for every match these days is easy, but Merson certainly manages to chat his fair share of nonsense.
Researchers and mathematicians up and down the UK have today been scrambling to find proof that a new number and/or gap in the space-time continuum proposed last night does indeed exist. Paul Merson was the man who put it forward, as a measure of just how poor Arsenal were in a 2-0 loss to Borussia Dortmund, saying that they were a 'gillion miles away from anything'.
That would put them both outside time and space in a dimension that possibly doesn't exist. We're not sure though, we'd need a theoretical physicist to check our rough work there.
Main pic via The Cannon 1886
