What kind of hold does Sinitta have over Simon Cowell, apart from the obvious, that is.
She wheels herself out once a year in something ridiculous (yet oddly marvellous) and then repeatedly goes out of her way to jeopardise her fleeting annual relevancy by yammering on like a hyperactive tween who's been at the Monster. I mean, it's like she's told to do it, or something...
Here's a collection of her latest Tweets. The subject at hand is apparent enough. If you're not arsed reading it, she pretty much says she'd like to spank Cheryl for choosing Gamu over Katie and/or the dangerously minature Cheryl/Lady Sov hybrid with the head of a 38-year-old. But she also wishes to congratulate Katie on getting through. Then she attempts to backtrack.
""Aaaaarrrrggh. Cheryl Noooo!!"
"WHAT????????!!! GAMUuUuuuuuuu!!! I'm gutted!!!! Gutted for GAmu."
"Well done katie!! ...still stunned about GAMU, what is wrong with tweedy pie??"
"What the hell happened?!! I need a tranquilizer... stunned..great day turned into a BAD night,,can't get over that."
"I know S delibearately keeps some things from me to get a reaction,but he missed a full on thunderstorm tonight! I'm a tornado!"
"I want somebody to realize..I have never even met her, so its not personal..but she touched me!I think we threw a super star away...ugh."
"Sorry,have to get it off my chest boring everyone to death- anyone who cares.I need to SLAP TWEEDYS butt for not putting Gamu through!"
"I love the girls but 2 of them were unable to bring it on the day...but GAmu was incredible...I love you T-P but you and me outside now!"
"Ok, reaching down twitter lines to retract those Tweedy-Pie tweets..she's the judge,not me...I know,I know, I KNOW!!"
"Still Love tweedypie! Would be moaning if it was S too! Last year I supported Jedward even when he couldn't stand that act! Look I Love tweedy pie I was just.... Gobsmacked and sick about it!"
"nobody Hates her, we love her! Look nomatter who went through, someone is disappointed,right?"
"no WaaaaY! This is silly! Its her choice! We love. CC, just having a tantrum about the choices, deep breath everyone!!"
Clearly Simon doesn't tell Sinitta certain things 'cause she's (possbily been asked to portray) an unhinged mouthpiece of a scantily clad ex-girlfriend who won't bugger off, but you'd think she would've gotten the brief about the X Factor's alternative working title - that being The Demographic Factor. I believe it also is known as The Geographic Factor.
But more on that next week...
