"Praise Jeeeeezus - the tight trousered Satan has been cast out of our brood, hallelujah!!! " That's just one sentiment one can assume past the lips of pastors Keith and Mary Hudson during a reputed 90 minute sermon regarding their daughter's split from Russell Brand.
Katy's mum Mary also said stuff like: "I'm sure Katy is trending on the internet just to get you to church tonight. I mean all over the world, who knows how God is bringing them in? The most important thing is you are here and God wants to put the fire in you in 2012." Much like Russell Brand wants to put the fire in every female on the planet.
Seriously though, Mary, God got 300 bums on seats in Ohio's Church on The Rise by ordering someone to put "Katy Perry's Parents Jan 4 & 5 7pm" on the roadside sign outside the church...
As for the tight-trousered Satan with the pant serpent of doom, it was never going to work out: "Russ was forever making lewd jokes at the dinner table and poking fun at her parents' beliefs. He managed to restrain himself in the beginning - just. But as the marriage progressed, he got worse and kept winding up her family."
As for Katy: "After the lust wore off, reality hit home about their differences and she was left thinking, 'What have I done?'"
Got lots of headlines for yourself. Job done.
