Feeling in need of some testosterone fuel? TV right now is full of men in masculine overdrive, from old school hard bosses to survival experts. Everyone is jumping in on the old stereotype of what manhood is perceived as, which apparently involves a lot of shouting, trips to extreme climates such as The Sahara and Alaska, taunting wild animals unnecessarily and pretending you sleep in the wild when really it's well known you are secretly put up in a penthouse suite somewhere close by to location (oops did we let that slip? Insert disclaimer of your choice). Here is a quick list of some of the most go get 'em, loudmouth manly-is-spelt-with-a-grr men on your telly as of now.
1. Bear Grylls
His adopted name Bear sums up what the man thinks of himself. His birth name Edward is far more commonplace and less nauseatingly self-promoting and cheesy, but this is the created identity of a person who has actually called his kids Huckleberry and Marmaduke. Known as the face of survival programmes, he never opts for the obvious choice like you would if really dropped into unknown dangerous terrain (you will never land yourself in that many situations where you need to drink your own pee), but instead shows off for thirty minutes to an hour. Here he is with Will Ferrell, who's constant piss-taking (not of the same variety) highlights how annoying Chief Scout Bear Grylls really is.
2.Ross Kemp
Kemp has turned investigative journalist, covering topics such as the war in Afghanistan, gangs and The Gaza Strip. Once the EastEnders hard-nut, he is now the macho bald guy (look at Bruce Willis; the equation between cue-ball heads and action heroes is not a coincidence) traversing through war-torn countries and asking the authorities how we can better tow the line.
3. Ray Mears
Ray Mears is the spare Bear if we are being honest, just in case you weren't sick of poncy conservative types messing around outdoors just to prove they still have the 'what ho' British gene reserved for public/grammar school folk.
4. Danny Dyer
With any luck for humanity, you will only ever encounter this programme if you're in the need for a cheap laugh, in the same vein as you may guiltily watch The Jeremy Kyle Show (obligatory gag).
5. Alan Sugar
Now this is one classy act. Yes, he is almost a parody of himself at this stage in the game, but all the more Sugar-isms are welcomed. The others in this list could learn a thing or two from Sugar; you need to have lightening quick comebacks and enough snappy rhetoric to satisfy the driest wit if you are going to play the parody game.
