Because this qualifies as 'news' today (we're ignoring the story about Colin Farrell rattling Lindsay Lohan yonks ago for obvious reasons): Kelly Brook's on/off/on boyfriend has been found guilty of crashing a van brimming with dead badgers.
David McIntosh was taking the carcasses to a furnace as part of the governments culling scheme (to prevent the spread of tuberculosis, fact fans) when he lost control of the vehicle and drove it into a nearby bus stop.
The former Gladiators star - who was hired as a security guard by a private firm - claims the crash was caused when a police radio used to give information on the location of anti-cull protesters fell under the brake pedal. So, essentially, he's blaming his equipment.
The ex-Marine said: 'The radio fell off the dashboard under the pedals and it was blocking the clutch and brake. I have driven under fire and always kept my composure.'
But his passenger, John Parker, reckons he went on the nod. Speaking to Stroud Magistrates court he said: "I looked up after feeling the vehicle change direction to see a bus stop. I can't say if he was asleep or not, but when I looked at David both of his hands were on the wheel, but his head was on his chest. I believe his eyes were shut."
It gets worse. 28-year-old David had been driving a VW Transporter when the incident occurred in Gloucester around 1am on September 29th, but he had his licence suspended for that class of vehicle after he ran a red light back in 2005.
David didn't appear in court but admitted by letter to careless driving without a valid license and was reprimanded with six penalty points and was fined £91, plus a £20 victim surcharge and £30 prosecution costs.
Himself and Kelly split six weeks ago after dating for several weeks on account of him being a fame monger, but are rumoured to have reunited after they were pictured enjoying a night out in London together earlier this week.
