Golden couple (no pressure) Brian O'Driscoll and Amy Huberman are tying the knot today. Little information from the event has passed through, other than The Coronas have been hired to play tomorrow's 'post nuptial sore head soiree' (Amy is a fan, so Brian hired them... 'cause Amy's a fan)
So, with nothing to play with, so to speak, Paddy Power are offering odds on various occurrences. They're giving 4/7 that Brian will push out an emotive tear at one point during ther ceremony at St Joseph's in Aughavas in Co. Leitrim. They're offering 8/1 on Damien O'Donoghue's speech lasting between five and six minutes. Other less likely odds are being bandied about for the appearance of Glenda Gilson at the wedding. Although the probability of Xpose producers making her stalk around outside Lough Rynn Castle with an oversized mic muff is fairly high.
This brings to mind a herd of likely scenarios, like the ring arriving at the back of a scrum comprising of the respective wedding parties, with it being passed under by O'Donoghue. Amy could also throw her bouquet into a line-out of feisty fillies, while Paul O'Connell and Peter Stringer recreate a certain number from Dirty Dancing.
Grubber and Banana kicks, and the odd scissors move, will be banged out in abundance on the dance floor, to such ditties as Eleanor Rugby, Johnny Cash's version of Wichita Lineout, and Ruck Your Body by the lesser known Black Eyed Props. Needless to say, Amy's medical background will come in handy once the injuries start coming in.
Those still standing will drop kick and shoulder charge any loose forwards or drunk hookers out of the reception and into the sin bin, before BOD and Hoobs trot off to engage in some 'up the jumper' activities, including double movements, up and unders, stiff-arm fends, downward pressure and one-on-one dominant spear tackles.
Aaaand that's quite enough of that.
