Although Johnny Logan's a two-time Eurovision winner, he's become more known of late for his increasingly bizarre outfit choices.
Case in point being last night's edition of Miriam when Logan came out in a silver jacket, black V-neck shirt and gold chain. That, in comparison to the stately Phil Coulter, attracted attention online.
Fuck me Johnny Logan looks like Flash Gordon #miriam @rte #johnnylogan
— Mushypea (@mushypea007) August 8, 2015
All I can think of watching Johnny Logan on #miriam pic.twitter.com/ZwLGaPzB2d
— John Cummins (@johnpcummins) August 8, 2015
Ah now, Johnny. #miriam pic.twitter.com/JXQqwODgt6
— Daithi (@tvcritics) August 8, 2015
As we did more research, we found that this wasn't just a one-off. Logan has a history of fashion crimes against nature and decency. With that in mind, we've collated nine instances when Johnny Logan's outfits personally victimised everyone around it.
9. GARTH BROOKS' OLDER, MORE FASHION-FORWARD BROTHER
That belt-buckle screams divorced, childless man who prowled through Break For The Border in the early '90s. Since then, he's opened up a successful taxi-service in Finglas and he's on Tinder quite a bit. QUITE. A. BIT.
#NowPlaying Hold Me Now by Johnny Logan 🎵 @ https://t.co/GG0AqVREtx - Buy it https://t.co/Ux4cZwwd9f pic.twitter.com/VLsxUT2C1f
— Hit Music Network 80 (@HitMusic80s) June 4, 2015
8. MIAMI VICE BACKGROUND EXTRA
The '80s was a huge time for Johnny Logan. Women spontaneously combusted at the sight of him and his swerving hips. At one point, a bronze statue of his 1987 victory at Eurovision was due to be commemorated. It was just going to be his hair and a microphone. It would have been glorious. This more recent outfit, however, makes it seem like he was a background extra in a half-decent episode of Miami Vice where Crockett investigated corruption at his old precinct.
Johnny Logan makes it all better... pic.twitter.com/IkS1XFCR2U
— NiamhDublin (@MintySilver) May 22, 2015
7. THE DEL MONTE MAN
The Man From Del Monte always says yes to a photo opportunity.
King of #Eurovision Johnny Logan, whats another year... #TheLateLateShow pic.twitter.com/u5MDezqDlQ
— Annie (@Dennisisamenace) February 27, 2015
6. THE WHOLE LEATHER THING
Johnny Logan's really into leather. Leather jacket. Leather gloves. Leather trousers. Leather.
Three years since I had Johnny Logan's sinister black leather glove on my shoulder. #Bohs @bfcdublin pic.twitter.com/njYjEdsbmP
— Luke O'Riordan (@luke_oriordan) November 27, 2014
5. THESE SUNGLASSES
...look incredibly familiar.
Irlanda | Eurovision'un efsanevi ismi Johnny Logan İstanbul'daydı. pic.twitter.com/b8sDbSNCU9
— Eurovision 2016 (@Eurovisn_Turkey) November 1, 2014
Ah. That's it.
4. POST-APOCALYPTIC WANDERER / ENTERTAINER
In the grim, dark future of 50,000AD, there is a place where two singers enter and only one leaves. THIS IS EUROVISION. And then Johnny Logan comes out swinging and becomes King of Bartertown and marries Tina Turner.
Me with my massive head holding the microphone, there "@ohallerjam: #JohnnyLogan #Bohs pic.twitter.com/oEWxihb62Q"
— Robert O'Reardon (@Robbie_OR) October 10, 2014
3. HIS VAST COLLECTION OF SCARVES
Some believe Johnny Logan designs these scarves in between his Dream Weaving / Tantric Meditation sessions. Others believe they're made from the hides of former Eurovision contestants he defeated in glorious combat.
#HoldMeNow #JohnnyLogan - Some man for one man pic.twitter.com/bldBYpOvJa
— James Galvin (@thegalviniser) October 11, 2013
2. JUSTIFIED-ERA JUSTIN TIMBERLAKE'S DAD
He's a good sort, y'know. He's trying to help his son by dressing up like him. He means well.
In the words of @nickybyrneoffic "You do not wanna miss this" To download Johnny Logan's Prayin' text Song 2 to 57082 pic.twitter.com/DNGoIVQXy5
— Alan Earls (@alearls) August 11, 2013
1. SKINNY JEANS THAT WOULD OUT-SKINNY BARWORKERS IN THAT HIPSTER PUB EVERYBODY GOES TO
Logan's many years of squeezing into leather pants has meant that he now possesses the ability to do full splits in skinny jeans unassisted. You're all just visiting Johnny Logan's skinny jeans world - he lives there.
Och så här ser han ut, Johnny Logan, om ni springer på honom i Vaxholm:) pic.twitter.com/IVGTs9eQSY
— Visiting Vaxholm (@visitingvaxholm) July 9, 2013