Supposedly it's the time of year that people should rejoice and revel in festive fun, prance around wrapped in tinsel, gorge on mince pies and listen to nothing but Christmas tunes for a month. We're on board with most of the above, but if you'll allow us to Bah Humbug for a moment, there are some REALLY ANNOYING Christmas songs out there.
This list may irk, shock or dismay many of you, but these are the Christmas tunes that really, really wreck our heads every year.
1. John Lennon and Yoko Ono - Happy Xmas (War is Over)
Yeah yeah, we get it – it's a Christmas song with a 'message'. It's also one of the most insufferable festive tunes ever recorded, its po-faced pomposity only rivalled by its smug sense of self-importance. But hey, that's John Lennon for you. "And so Happy Christmas, I hope you have fun…" – yeah, we will, thanks. No guilt trip necessary. Give us Macca's cheesefest 'Wonderful Christmastime' any day of the week.
2. Bruce Springsteen - Santa Claus is Coming to Town
A song deemed a 'Christmas classic' by Bruce 'Not the Boss of Me' Springsteen fans, but not by many other people. Ha ha, it's funny because it's a cutesy Christmas song and he's playing it as a rock tune, right? Ha! Brilliant. Not. In fact, the opposite of brilliant. Shite.
3. Chris De Burgh - A Spaceman Came Travelling
Not even after 12 pubs of Christmas when you're in a cheesy nightclub – no, in fact not even after the nightclub when you're in the chipper crying into your taco fries with ketchup on your Christmas jumper and this song comes on the radio - is it acceptable to sing along. Some lines just need to be drawn.
4. Aled Jones - Walking in the Air
Look, we get it. You associate this song with The Snowman and isn't it great when he flies up into the air, and didn't you cry at the end when you were eight and saw it for the first time on Christmas Eve, etc… whatever. It doesn't detract from the fact that Aled Jones's piercing choirboy vocals are BLOODY ANNOYING.
5. Mud – Lonely This Christmas
Okay, okay. Tiger Feet is a glam rock classic, and you can have that, Mud. But if we wanted an Elvis Christmas song, we would have listened to Elvis' Christmas album. They may have intended it to sound that way, but it's still a poor, poor song.
6. Cliff Richard - Mistletoe & Wine
We'll be honest – this one is touch and go for us. On one hand, we have fond memories of seeing this song on Christmas Top of the Pops as a kid, and there is no denying that is has just the right ratio of cheese for a Christmas tune. Yet on the other hand, Cliff Richard. Sorry, mum.