If the words 'Daphne and Celeste' strike fear into your heart, you're probably best off not reading on - because the following earworms may just ruin your day.
The New Jersey duo have just made their comeback with a new single, 'You and I Alone' - but it got us thinking about their glory days, when songs like 'Ooh Stick You!' and 'U.G.LY.' made an impact on the charts.
The scariest thing? When it comes to disgustingly irritating pop songs of that era, Daphne and Celeste aren't even the worst offenders.
Read on, at your peril, for eleven awful songs from the late 1990s/early 2000s that are guaranteed to drive you bonkers.
1) DAPHNE & CELESTE – 'U.G.L.Y.'
Let's kick off with this reminder of why we're here today. We can all agree that this track, released in 2000, is both shrill and musically mundane, not to mention pretty mean-spirited. Horrible.
2) BUFFALO G – 'We're Really Saying Something'
Speaking of pop duos, here's another mercifully short-lived one. Buffalo G were comprised of Dubliners Olive Tucker and Naomi Lynch, the younger sister of Boyzone's Shane and B*Witched's Keavy and Adele. Presumably, they were formed to piggyback on the Lynch pop bandwagon, because there's little of musical merit here. Opening line: 'Take two girls from Dublin / Stir it around, we're troublin'". Not even Dustin the Turkey could save this one. Actually, 'turkey' is one way to describe it.
3) B*WITCHED – 'C'est La Vie'
You can't have a list of irritating pop songs without including this turd. Was it the happy-clappy video? The perky vocals? The double-denim? The cod-Oirishness? Yes, basically. All of it. All. Of. It.
4) SHAMPOO – 'Trouble'
This one is a little bit older, but no less annoying. Released in 1994, it was a smash hit and was used in the promotional campaign for the Power Rangers Movie in 1995. Which says it all, basically. Juvenile, grating, infuriating. Make it stop.
5) THE CHEEKY GIRLS – 'Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum)'
Identical twins from Romania flop out of the X Factor, then decide to sacrifice any remaining dignity by getting their arses out and releasing a song about getting their arses out. In a way, you can't blame them from trying to milk their pathetic level of fame for all it was worth. If you bought this single in 2002, however, go stand in the corner and think about what you've done. There are 1.2 million of you worldwide, apparently. Terrifying.
6) DJ OTZI – 'Hey Baby'
"Hey guys, I have a great idea!"
"What's that, DJ Otzi?"
"How about I take a 1960s classic pop tune, put a really sh*t dance beat on it, render it virtually unrecognisable and make millions from the idiots with terrible taste who think it's 'funny' or 'cute'?"
"Well, there are certainly plenty of those in the world. You're a genius. Mwuahahahaha!"
7) CRAZY FROG – 'Axel F'
If this one needs explaining to you, then you're part of the problem. It genuinely worries us that 82 million people have watched this video on YouTube. We fear for humanity.
8) BILLIE – 'Because We Want To'
Before Billie Piper established herself as an actually-alright actress, she was a pop star (I know, we've tried to forget about it, too). She was plucked from obscurity after appearing in a TV ad for Smash Hits (R.I.P.) and landed a record deal at the age of 15. Although she had some passable pop songs in her time (like Honey to the B), this - her debut single - was godawful. That childish, meh-meh-meh-meh chorus, Jeeeeeeeesus. You wouldn't even hear it in a playground full of stubborn toddlers. Irritating, annoying, nauseating and generally makes us want to break things.
9) AKON - 'Lonely'
This man needed to be stopped well before this monstrosity of a song broke through - and bear in mind that it was his first single. The fact that he had such a global smash with this absolute muck - which defecated all over the Bobby Vinton 1962 song that it sampled, by the way - is cause for despair. It's horrible, just horrible, and Akon is a charlatan. No wonder he's lonely - we wouldn't be mates with him, either.
10) STEPS – 'Tragedy'
I'll tell you what's tragic: the fact that the Bee Gees actually allowed their disco classic to be covered in such an inane, soulless manner by one of pop music's biggest jokes. We could have picked any of Steps' tracks for this list's purpose, but this is hands-down one of the worst. And that's before we mention the dance moves. It's not cute or funny. It's not catchy. It's wrong.
11) DANIEL BEDINGFIELD – 'Gotta Get Thru This'
Take one generic male vocalist with a bad goatee. Add irksome nasal tone plus one measure of smugness. Mix with crap, cheap-sounding pop song that will age even worse than you expect it to. Voila: here's a Bedingfield we made earlier.