Total Recall (2012)

First of all, let me point out something. The first Total Recall isn’t a masterpiece - it's actually pretty far from it. Although a great Phillip K Dick story, it's very much an Arnie vehicle that is heightened by Paul Verhoeven 's fun direction. Deep down it's merely a solid, fun action film built around the former Guvanator. Granted, remaking it is still pretty damn lazy and this Colin Farrell led film is far from a masterpiece also - but it moves at such a breakneck speed it's often hard to notice.

This Total Recall doesn't take the action to Mars, but rather stays on (future) earth where there are essentially two regions left not destroyed by chemical warfare - The United Federation of Britain and The Colony (essentially The UK and Australia). The Colony is a bit of a dump, and that's where Colin Farrell's Doug Quaid and his missus (an aggressive Kate Beckinsale) live; but all is not what it seems as Doug partakes in a procedure called "Total Recall" which either reveals the real him or places him in a dream. Either way he's now a super agent on the run from the authorities in the far plusher UFB, after he defects to the revolutionaries that also include Jessica Biel's asskicking love interest - who he'd been dreaming about also (hey, who hasn’t?).

Heavily criticized in America and widely considered a box-office failure, this straight up action flick ostensibly suffers from comparisons to theVerhoeven original. Naturally there are purists out there that will cry foul whenever a remake is announced, regardless of the quality of the film. Throw in the guy (unfairly) slated by fanboys after Die Hard 4.0 as director, and you've got bad buzz before a camera has even rolled. Total Recall is an absolutely gorgeous looking film and - technically speaking - is one of the strongest of the year. Wiseman does a deft, fluid job with the action and the pace never falters. The problem is the script, which this poor cast has to deal with - especially Farrell.

Colin Farrell is riding a wave of credibility after the critical darling that was In Bruges. As for his blockbuster choices over the years, he's been unlucky and has generally done good work when top drawer directors weren’t at their best. Even with the laughable Alexander, you can't really blame him - but rather Oliver Stone and whoever decided to dye his hair. He's a far superior actor to Arnie, and impresses with his new found physicality but doesn’t have much actually acting to do. Biel has the most underwritten character (if you don't count Bryan Cranston who is barely in it) but looks good kicking ass, while Beckinsale is having a blast.

Your quintessential Hollywood no-brainer, handled with enough skill to make it just about worthwhile.