This is not a satirical article, this is actually happening and there's actual, verifiable proof it's happening.
Leonardo DiCaprio's production company, Appian Way, plans on rebooting '90s cartoon hit Captain Planet and the Planeteers for the modern era. According to THR, Captain Planet was originally at Sony and was stuck in development hell for a number of years, however Paramount and DiCaprio snapped up the rights and are now actively working to get it on screen.
What's more, Scream Queens' star Glen Powell has been tapped to pen a much more subversive take on the well-known cartoon character, with Captain Planet now a washed-up has-been who needs the Planeteers more than they need him. If Whoopi Goldberg doesn't return as Gaia or if Meg Ryan isn't in there as Doctor Blight, we riot on the streets.
Also, there has to be some reference to that god-awful Belfast episode too.
There's been no official word yet on casting or when it'll enter production or be released, but we're loudly humming the theme tune until then.