So David Gest’s made a film about his good friend Michael Jackson’s sexuality, and how they never did it, because they’re both straight, and that’s the important thing, according to Liza Minnelli’s ex-husband.
Of Michael Jackson - The Life of an Icon, The Guardian’s Simon Hattenstone said: “Gest sets out to prove categorically that Jackson was a heterosexual. He was 100% man, he tells us. Not to put too fine point on it, he says, Michael loved women. Loved them. As a young man, he had his "bones jumped" by a legendary actress, who shall remain nameless… After a special screening, I meet the ‘stars’ of the film. Gest is in no doubt that the police pursued a vendetta against Jackson. ‘He was proven not guilty in all the trials,’ he said. ‘In the molestation case he was exonerated. I show that 70 police cars came to Neverland. Not even for a mass murderer like Charles Manson do they send 70 police cars, and what do they find? They find Playboy, nude women showing their tits and other parts. Do they find any child porn? No. Do they find anything on the computer about little boys? No. Were there any pictures of little boys in the house? No. He was a real man, and I think people see [in the film] he was married twice, he loved women, he lost his virginity at 19.’ The more he made the case for Jackson's heterosexuality the more passionate he becomes.”
None of this is news though, really, is it. This is news. That’s Sinitta’s mum, that is. I know, she must be at least 80, but there she is, resembling a 40-year-old more feminine Fatima Whitbread, which makes her a good ten years younger than her daughter.
Also attending last night’s premiere: Rebbie and Tito Jackson; Alexandra Burke and her brother; Mandy, Hevvah and Kim off EastEnders; the Bowman; Liz McClarnon; and Russell Kane and his girlfriend (I know, I know).
The rest of the guests were evidently hand picked to make Gest feel at home: We have Sarah Jane Crawford and Lisa Voice both putting the remnants of their Halloween make up to use; Caprice; Nancy Dell'Olio; the mandatory Michael Jackson lookalike; and Jodie Marsh’s nose in all its magnificence. It must be bench pressing it's own body weight at this point. It needs to lay off the creatine shakes.
