At long last the first episode of Game of Thrones season six has arrived. Fair play to you brave soldiers who sat up until 2am to watch the simulcast, but we're assuming the majority of you will be watching/have watched it on Monday. Even if you haven't, we wouldn't be too over-concerned with spoilers here, mainly because, there isn't all that much to spoil. Essentially the first episode was a quick 'howya' with everyone, to check in who's alive, who's dead, and who is in fact a 250-year-old woman... but we'll get to that.

The episode kicked off where we left it, with our dear Jon Snow lying on the ground in Castle Black - Dead. As. A. Doornail, so he was. But sure we all knew that, didn't we? The real hope always lied with Melisandre arriving in and casting her mad witch powers on him to make him come back to life.... right?! However, while The Red Priestess definitely looked a bit bummed to see that Jon Snow had passed, she certainly didn't appear to be too preoccupied with bringing him back to life. In fact, in the final moments of the episode, she somehow morphed into the old lady from Titanic and got into bed. Ah here, we all have our bad days but now is not the time for a nap, Mel!

Hopefully she'll be well-rested by next week so she can get up and work her mojo on Jon. Yes, we know - the denial is strong here.

Next up, we caught up with Sansa and Reek following their great escape from Winterfell. Things weren't looking too good for this pair at all, but hand's down we've got to award the best moment of the episode to Brienne and Pod riding in together like proper knights in shining armour to save the day. Pod has certainly come on in his swordsmanship hasn't he just?

Brienne then devoted her life to Sansa once more, and for the first time in Game of Thrones, it started to feel like things were looking up for Sansa.

We can't say the same for Cersei over in King's Landing however. While she certainly is rockin' the pixie crop, she was dealt with yet another blow when she discovered what we already knew from last season, that her daughter Myrcella had died. However, Cersei does have Jaimie by her side once more, and in a spattering of effing and blindin', he swore they would have vengeance on all that wronged them.

Meanwhile in Dorne, Westeros' answer to the Kardashians were busy killing everyone off to take hold of the city themselves. Sure no better women. You'd miss Oberyn though all the same, wouldn't you?

Out in Meereen then, the two lads were struggling to maintain power as they've realised that Daenerys and her dragon may not be coming back anytime soon. Never fear though Lord Friendzone and Daeny's 'friend's with benefits' soldier are already on track to come to their gal's rescue, who has since been captured by the Dothraki

Daenarys of course is well able to handle herself, although it's starting to look like she may be in way over her head on this one. Turns out being Khal Drogo's former missus may not count for as much as we hoped. Drogon... where you at?

Out by the House of Black and White then we had poor Arya who's in a very bad way. Not only blind, and begging on the streets, she also now has daily visits from her frenemy with the stick to deal with. Here's hoping this one is just going all mean Miyagi on her to train her into the ass-kicking ninja we all know Arya can be.

The episode finished up where it began, back in Castle Black where Ser Davos was busy guarding Jon Snow's body and making deals for mutton with Thorne, but just how long can they buy time for? And will they be able to wake up the Red Woman to give them a dig out/resurrect-the-one-true-hero-Jon-Snow-who-is-definitely/maybe-the-key-to-it-all?

We'll just have to wait a whole SEVEN MORE DAYS to find out.

Sigh.

Game of Thrones, we are your loyal servants once more.