Coronation Street: So, the inevitable happened, Kirsty found the secret phone, but went away with the wedding regardless to put on a display when vow time rocked around. Kirsty produced the phone, did her quivering lip, buggy eyed rage thing, and then rang Fiz's phone which rang out across the church. The Vicar kept asking what as going on; it's a soap wedding love, it's against the law for one of these to go smoothly. As if that weren't enough drama, Kirsty uses a tumble down the stairs to her advantage, leaving residents wonder just who has been abusing who in chez Dobbs. Tyrone ended up in jail, desperate to see his baaaybah. With Jenna suspended (we're still meant to care, apparently), Sophie announced that she's going to announce to all that she instigated the kiss; Lewis started tapping Gail for money to launch their fictitious Italian retreat; and Anna tried to lay the law down to stop Faye seeing her dad, who's just popped out of nowhere.
Emmerdale: Ah Debbie, it's not like you to be ruthless. You'd never lure Dom for your own gain, swiping his keys to steal his client list, and then essentially setting your father on him, and so on. And poor Cain has enough to be dealing with; Moira wasn't bothered inviting him THE event on the farming calendar - the Farmer's Ball. Megan was unimpressed when Robbie refused to carry on working for her, resulting in Priya and Alicia's breasts both unwittingly go for the same job at Home Farm. Priya got it. Rachel panicked when it came to finally bringing Archie home; and then Jay had a fit of jealousy in the Woolly and set about abusing Sam; while Thomas recruits Sean as the newest member of the 'We Hate Chas' gang.
EastEnders: Max and Tanya's relationship was on the edge - part 361. Still, at least no one's buried anyone else in the woods as yet. Still dealing with the fallout from Max's secret wife with the well dodgy hair extensions, Tanya decided to take charge of the situation best she can, but her methods leave Max reeling. She dumped him. One for the ladies, yaaay. And then she got hammered and was seen sitting in the street, bawling that she stlll loved him. Lola visited Phil in the hope of spending some extra time with Lexi but she was horrified when she hears what Phil has to tell her - he was going to bring Lexi on holiday… to meet Peggy. Meanwhile, Dot and Cora are still at loggerheads over that business with the rent and what not.
Fair City: Tommy got a right eyeful this week; he only walked in on his wife getting on down with Blackie Connors. Still, at least he had all the house work to keep his mind off things while Judith continued cavorting with his brother. Then Zak wound up in hospital… Rachel went on a spending spree with Rita's money; Jo was a devious Agony Aunt to a very confused Dermot; and as Suzanne prepared to leave Carraigstown but did Damien's romantic overtures convince his one-time abuser to stay?! I should be able to tell you, but I can only bring myself to watch Fair City a few times a month.