Remember when Paris left prison and said she was done with rollicking around town, partying? I hate to be the one to tell you this but... she lied. After surveying recent footage of her endorsing Sunday nights at Vegas club LAX, we can safely assume she's determined to squander whatever redundant cells she has knocking around her headspace. Her speech (which we're not going to post cause we couldn't find the bleeped version) onstage at LAX went something like this: "It's Sunday f***ing night, but DJ AM is here. He has all his boys, he f***ing rocks... Everyone's rocking their f***ing balls off... LAX... we're all here with f***ing DJ AM... All of AM's f***ing boys are here and they rock... There are so many hot girls and boys here, I want to f*** you all." This is a rough version of what was caterwauled; trying to decipher her slurred repetitions was further hampered by my bleeding ears. Despite this fine display of public speaking, Paris was still awarded Harvard University's coveted 'Woman of the Year' award. According to The New York Post: "The socialite is scheduled to stop by the Cambridge, Massachusetts institution on February 6 during a promotional tour for her new movie The Hottie And The Nottie." There are too many henious sentiments swirling around my brain to actually formulate a cohesive sentence of disdain, a simple "I dispair" coupled with an "I fear the future of mankind" will have to suffice.