Yeah, so we might have been a little premature posting the Vanity Fair Oscars After Party photos yesterday... this morning we've found several stragglers. No wonder Victoria Beckham looked mortified, she was one of the first there. Scarleh.
We had people who changed their gowns; Jennifer Lopez shimmied into an even more revealing number, while Cameron Diaz changed into a Beckham gown, so chin up Victoria. The back, however, kind of let it down. Exposed zips are gack. Shailene Woodley ditched her suture dress for a Golden Girls lanai throw, while Emma Stone managed to not get it right twice in one night. Awkward. As it happens, quite a few people went for the 'I'm not quite carrying off this fussy-yet-transparent look' (Ginnifer Goodwin, Zoe Saldana and Kate Bosworth). And then there was Elizabeth Olsen, who just went with the full on "S&M Toilet Roll Holder En Route to a Business Lunch" look. If you're going to do the leather gown look, Elizabeth, take a leaf out of Felicity Jones' leabhar.
There were several 'Print Malfunctions': Elizabeth Banks, Aimee Mann, Lily Collins, Lucy Walker, Amara Miller, Random Guest (the drooping, the ruching, the bunching...) and to a lesser extent, Kate Beckinsale. And don't think you're getting away with it, Woodley. Lastly, January Jones, I want to like it, but the thing going on up top makes it impossible to do so. had it been teamed with something more plain and fitted, it would've looked very chique.
The malfunctions weren't just relegated to print; we also have cleavage malfunction (when it starts resembling a meandering river, it might be time to put it away Suzanne); Kate Upton didn't have her boobs out, which is a crime against Sports Illustrated (fellow models Irina Shayk and Bar Refaeli did manage to share the burden somewhat. Olivia Munn tried to get involved, but couldn't quite pull it off. Or up.) Another person who should only ever expose cleavage is Salma Hayek. Unfortunately, in this instance, she went with the always wrong "Maid Marion in a community production of Robin Hood" look. Meanwhile, Rachael Harris actually wore a stage curtain tie.
In other news - tennis players look far better in court gear. Hello Maria Sharapova. Perhaps she's having a laugh, you know, getting dressed up as a princess so she can blow ex-boyfriend Adam Levine a kiss (remember, he once likened having sex with her to fornicating with a "dead frog.") Serena Williams highlighted who would win an onstage "arse off" between herself, JLo and Cameron Diaz, while sister Venus was the only tennis player who managed to dress herself. Comparably.
Worst get up of the night, however, had to go to Jim Sturgess's date. It's not 1986, and you're not Molly Ringwald. It is, however, the Vanity Fair Oscars After Party, have a little fun with it.
Those who did themselves proud included pretty much anyone in metallic hues...
See the rest of this piece on our dedicated Oscars Page.