That Miranda Kerr is in the throes of labour... That Ted 'Golden Voice' Williams has no less than nine kids (7 boys, 2 girls). He also has a few grand kids to throw into the mix. I'm sure they're all thrilled he's found some gainful employment... That Piers Morgan's first interviewee, when his new talk show kicks off on January 17th,will be none other than Oprah Winfrey... It's emerged that the real reason as to how Morgan landed Larry King's coveted slot was because he "made Simon Cowell cry" during one of his interviews... Nice work, Cowell... That Simon and his alleged fiancé, (I want to call her) Megan, are going through a rough patch 'cause he can't quit the exes... That Heidi Montag has come across with the expected "woe is me, look at my countless battle wounds from my innumerable elective surgeries" photo shoot for Life & Style magazine: "Parts of my body definitely look worse than they did pre-surgery. This is not what I signed up for". To recap, Heidi now has: "a two-inch-long blemish under her chin from her chin reduction, two caterpillar-sized bald spots along her hairline from a brow lift, a horrifying jagged line behind her ears from having her ears pinned back, lumpy legs and four spots left on her lower back and below the buttocks from botched liposuction, a bright red mark inside her right nostril, uneven boobs, a stretched mark on her chest and deep scars around her nipples from a second boob job"... Attractive... That Nathan Followill beat Prince Harry at ping-pong backstage at their O2 gig: "We're still pretty wide-eyed about meeting dignitaries but he's the cool prince I think. He picked up a ping-pong bat backstage and we went at it. I'm not sure what the etiquette is when you play a prince at table tennis, but hey, I'm a king aren't I? A king trumps a prince. I think the other guys thought, 'Maybe you should let a real prince win'. But he is so tall and he's got military training so I figured he can look after himself. It was a hard-fought battle but I took him in the end"... That of the prospect of dating Cheryl Cole, Justin Bieber said: "Well, first of all, it would be illegal cos she's, like, too old... My mum's 35 (!?!??!!!...??!!?!?!), so she's closer to my mum's age than she is mine"... That here be our first mug shot of 2011, one Jamie Pressly... Apparently she's 33... That Cameron Diaz needs to keep her pie hole shut... That Ricky Gervais will voice Moley in the "new live-action" remake of The Wind in The Willows... That Brad Pitt will play John Lennon?... That Matt Damon is mightily miffed at Universal...

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