Not everyone has been involved in a shoot-out, or chased by ghosts, or been contacted by aliens, but if there is one thing everyone has an opinion on, it’s sex. Whether you are or not, everyone thinks they’re good at it, and we can spot when someone on the big screen is bad at it. But sometimes that’s the point, and the so-bad-it’s-good sex-scenes (the Showgirls pool scene was THIS close to making the list) are almost as enjoyable as the filthy, dirty, raunchy ones.

So here they are, our ten favourite sex scenes in movies. Enjoy! But in privacy, please… Also, if you want to watch these scenes, you'll have to do some creeping of your own, what kind of filthy publication did you think this was? Pffft.

BASIC INSTINCT
This is kind of the go-to for awesome sex scenes. Yes, it’s almost completely unrealistic - a bisexual millionaire genius potential murderer with mirrors on her ceilings, as you do - but the bedroom gymnastics they get up to are nothing less than… we’re sorry for this… titillating. Plus, that bit where Sharon Stone ties Michael Douglas to the bed and then leans back and you think she’s gonna whip an ice-pick out? Danger Sex FTW!



TEAM AMERICA
“If you can promise me that you’ll never die, I’ll have sex with you right now.”
“I promise. I’ll never die.”
Cut to two puppets getting into every position that the Karma Sutra has to offer, plus a few new ones, just for the sake of variety. Just about as funny as a sex scene could possibly get.

OK, this one we can include, they're puppets so it's OK.



ATONEMENT
Keira Knightley and James McAvoy are two young lovers who, much like two young lovers are known to do, cannot keep their hands off each other. So they rendezvous at an empty library and enjoy a quick, randy session against the bookcase. The realness of the scene, doubled up with the fact that it is the lynchpin for the rest of the movie’s plot, is what makes it twice as hot, and twice as sad.

OUT OF SIGHT
Getting too arty-farty with your sex scenes can be a turn off, but this one between George Clooney and Jennifer Lopez, which cuts back and forth between them sitting in a bar making good with the flirty, dirty talk, and then the two of them in a hotel room, stripping off for each other, is an exercise in prolonged foreplay. And when they do finally hit the mattress and go at it, you know it’s going to be a good time for all involved.



MULHOLLAND DRIVE
Lesbian sex scenes can often feel exploitative or just there for the sake of helping the male viewers get their jollies off to, but that is not the case with Mulholland Drive. Two women, one with amnesia (Laura HArring), the other helping her piece together her life (Naomi Watts), a burgeoning friendship, that results in one of the most passionate yet tenderly erotic love scenes ever filmed.



BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN
A sex scene that shows love and lust are two commanding forces that are beyond most people’s control. With so much communicated without the use of any words, that first night in the tent between Heath Ledger and Jake Gylenhaal, where the initial confusion gave way to the palpable physical longing was a moment that most viewers can relate to, regardless of sexuality.



9 SONGS
The inclusion of actual, unsimulated sex scenes is not an idea held solely by this movie (see also: Shortbus), but there was a sense that the sex scenes in 9 Songs were also telling a story. As we see this couple go to a gig, then have sex, then go to a gig, then have sex, over and over, this was glorified, cinematic lovemaking. This was warts and all, real nitty-gritty of two adults have sex, with the explicitness of hard-core porn mixed with the proper acting you’d NEVER find in ANY kind of porn.



SOCIETY
Sex isn’t always a beautiful thing, as you’d discover if you ever watch this 1989 cult classic horror film. Billy Warlock is convinced there’s something up with his family, friends and entire neighbourhood, and it turns out he’s absolutely right. They are a different species of creature, who just look human, and often take part in ritualistic orgies that result in them melding together into one giant, oozing, sticky blob of arms, legs, tongues and bums. Lovely.



A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE
If ever there was a sex scene that single-handedly told you everything you needed to know about a character, it’s the stair-case nookie in this movie. Earlier on, Viggo Mortensen’s wife is dressed up as a cheerleader, and they embark on some fun, flirtatious sex. But once the dark side of his character is revealed, the couple end up going at it on the wooden stairs, all fierce thrusts and no romance. As much as she doesn’t know her husband at this moment, Mario Bello can’t help but find this new side to him sexually appealing. And who says girls don’t REALLY like bad boys??

Well we couldn't pick a 10th scene because there's just TOO many but here's some special mentions:
Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis in BLACK SWAN
Diego Luna, Gael Garcia Bernal and Maribel Verdu in Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN
Ryan Gosling and Michelle Williams in BLUE VALENTINE
Wei Tang and Tony Leung Chiu Wai in LUST, CAUTION
Reece Witherspoon and Ryan Phillipe in CRUEL INTENTIONS
Michael Douglas and Glenn Close in FATAL ATTRACTION

Think there’s any we’ve forgotten? Sound off in the comments below!