Hmmm. The Osbournes are getting a lot of airtime - no thanks to Sharon's book release (yep, publishers hunted her down to write a novel... *wails*) and the family's impending return en masse return to our screens ('cause their presenting skills went down a storm at The BRITS a few years back...)

As a result, we've got Sharon saying she walked from the X Factor because she "couldn't stand the bullsh*t" (that won't stop her returning to fill pregnant Dannii Minogue's seat this year, mind you), and Kelly saying stuff like this about plastic surgery:

"When I get older, yeah definitely. I think it can be a great thing, it’s just that people take advantage of it and it gets scary. My mum and I call them Vegas faces or Sellotape faces. They think they look sexy when they’ve got lips like vaginas. They’re just cardboard cut-outs of each other." Sure they are, just ask Ruby Wax.

Speaking of her mother's elective dalliances, however, she said: "What plastic surgery has done for her is incredible. She was successful, except she didn't feel comfortable with her looks. Then suddenly she had confidence and everywhere she went people called her beautiful and told her she looked great and she became the woman she always wanted to be (an incensed bulldog with defined cheekbones). I think my mum is beautiful."

Well, one has to say that.