To be honest, I half watched this with no headphones (largely because the documentary - One Direction, a Year in The Making - first aired back in November. It's rearing it's head on the t'internet today because - apart from Jim Davidson - there's not a lot else going on), and presumed he was taking the mick. Then I managed to locate the headphones, and definitely presumed he was taking the mick given the tinkling piano in the background. Then I listened to what he said.
C'mere 'til I give you a hug / friendly slap about the chops, young fellah. "They" don't like you because you're pretty, very successful, pretty, have amazing hair, and are cavorting about with a list of fantasy women. And did we mention how pretty you are? Malcontents hate that.
Again, I'll refer to Lisa Simpson and Paul Anka's rendition of Just Don't Look, which you may recall from such episodes as The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror VI. I would post a YouTube clip for that too if Fox were more accommodating.