The White Countess

Shanghai, 1936 and the once great diplomat Todd Jackson (Fiennes) has turned his back on politics after he is left blind when his house and family go up in flames. Never one to succumb to melancholy, he opens a high class night club - The White Countess - in the city and needs the help of Sofia Belinsky (Richardson), a former Russian Countess who has been reduced to working as a prostitute to feed her banished family, as a host. Soon, the formal relationship grows into something more although Jackson wants to keep business separate from his private life. The club is a success but the impending Japanese invasion looms over everyone.

Thirty minutes in and you'll be hoping the Japanese will invade the cinema as The White Countess gives Last Holiday a run for its money as one of the most boring films released this year. A Merchant Ivory (the producing-directing team of Ishmael Merchant R.I.P and James Ivory) production has its own checklist and The White Countess ticks every box: an upper class Englishmen who struggles with portraying his emotions - check, sepia-toned film - check, lawn tennis - check. Director James Ivory must have some incriminating photographs of Ralph Fiennes, as he normally wouldn't star in such ho-hum trivial nonsense as this. Initially Fiennes, who must have dabbled in a little method acting and had not read the script since his character is blind, is a notch above anyone else on screen but after awhile he is dragged down to the level of his poor lines. Richardson, who keeps the accent police from her door with her passable Russian drawl, fares no better as she never believes in her character or the lines she is given. Long gone are the Merchant Ivory hey-day of Remains Of The Day and Howard's End.