Master of Disguise

Maybe it's because his old Wayne's World sparring partner, Mike Myers never saw fit to include him in the lucrative Austin Power gag, but Dana Carvey is apparently intent on creating his own idiotic franchise with the harshly ineffective and creatively redundant Master of Disguise, a comedy so lame that it makes Goldmember appear to be the work of a comic genius. Yup, it's that bad.

The script, which appears to have been written by a 12 year-old with learning difficulties, sees Carvey play Pistachio, a waiter in his father's Italian restaurant in New York. It's obvious that Pistachio has a talent for mimicry, but his father, Frabbrizio (Brolin), has never told his son of their family's secret history as being pre-eminent masters of disguise and ace crime fighters to boot. When an adversary of his father, Bowman (Brent Spiner) kidnaps the old codger, it's up to Pistachio to learn how to harness his talents. Throw in a foxy assistant (Jennifer Esposito, God bless her sultry little socks) and you've got all the ingredients for a lame collection of gags and set pieces, remarkable only for their lack of imagination and humour. The only good thing about it is, if for some reason you are forced (under the pain of death presumably) to see Master of Disguise, it only clocks in at 78 minutes. Life is full of small mercies.