For those who aren't quite starry enough to gain entry to the ceremony itself, there's always the Vanity Fair After Party. Well, of course there were a few who graced both events, but they're not exactly the glitterati of acting - namely Jennifer Aniston's maniacal smile and Sarah Jessica Parker's baps. Eat your heart out, Lynda Carter.

Here's what the guests may have been thinking...

Madonna: "What do you mean Jesus ran off that way? Man, he's dead MEAT when I get my hands on him. After I spent so much time choosing his gimp outfit and everything.

Uma Thurman: Cooo eee! I'm here! I was just finishing some champers in the car. How do I get closer to the cameras? Oh, I work it over - uh huh" *hics*

John Mayer: "I knew she'd come in handy in the long run..."

Madonna: "SO embarrassing..."

Uma Thurman: "Madge, f*** it all. C'MON, let's VOGUE!"

Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer: "Yes, Jen, we're at the Vanity Fair after party. Wheee."

Halle Berry: "OK, it looks like a peacock getting violated by a zebra but I've always got the man candy."

Uma Thurman: "KISSES!"

Debra Messing: "I'm NEVER going to be able to hold my breath until I get inside…"

Dennis Hopper: "Seriously. Guess what age this one is."

Gwen Stefani: "Well, I'm sure someone in here will appreciate what I can do with a half-shredded bath mat and a ribbon."

Rachel Weisz: "Weeeell, I don't want to outshine any of the winners, now do I. It's only polite to look, you know, crap."

Len Wiseman: "You look stunning dahling, and to think you were going to go with a pair of Lady GaGa pants.

Matthew Broderick: "Honey, they get it, we still find each other attractive. Now tuck that boob back in."