Generally, when you split from a long-term partner, you take solace in a variety of ways - usually involving gross levels of self-indulgence with the aid of alcohol, fried foods, and the ears (and sometimes arms, depending on who you choose to spill to) of another.
David Arquette, being the youngest in a family of essentially rampant attention seekers, chose to spill to a few million ears - by going on Howard Stern's radio show and divulging intimate details regarding his sex life. Here's what he had to say:
"After our 11th anniversary, she gave me a motorcycle and said 'I don't want to be your mother anymore'. I get it. We go to do Scream 4 and I'm feeling distance from my wife. We have not had sex in quite a few - well, at that time a month or so. Since then it's been four months or so.... We're not having sex and I completely understand. She's in a place of wanting to be real and emotional. She's an emotional being, an amazing woman and if she doesn't feel right, she doesn't feel like bonding in that way. There's this whole process, she's very reflective of where our relationship was. After we got back we decided to get into a trial separation. We're still tight, I love her with all my heart and she loves me with all her heart... OK, so we get a trial separation and we have agreements with it. She knows she's not f*cking me and she's like 'listen, I want you to be able to do whatever you have to do'. You know, essentially I'm free to see people. I don't have a girlfriend, I had sex with a girl once. Maybe twice. It doesn't even matter... But let me get to the story! So she said that to me, 'I don't want to be your mother anymore'. I appreciated that, I respected that. I've been going to therapy, I'm trying to grow up (he's 40 next September), I'm trying to be my true self, trying to be true to myself. Trying to figure out myself and my world, as is she... We're best friends (eh, probably not anymore!), she's the greatest woman I've ever met. The moment I met her, I knew, she's the greatest woman in the whole f*cking world. Now, yes, she's got her issues. She tries to take on everybody's problems, she tries to be the mother of everyone and that's why she doesn't want to be the mother of me anymore."
So, this is how David Arquette treats the "greatest women in the whole f*cking world", and the mother of his child; going on Howard Stern to bang on about how she hasn't "f**ked" him in four whole months after 11 years of propping him up. Most would've stopped after year 5 of relentless mothering... that's when it starts to get weirdly Oedipal.
Roll on the next victim! I'm guessing she'll be a twenty-something with father issues.
