GaGa Plays Homage to Madge's Vadge. Again.

There have been many interpretations regarding Lady GaGa's get up at the 13th Annual ACE Awards Gala held at Cipriani, NYC, on Monday night. Incidentally, she was there to accept the "Stylemaker" award for being "well-appointed in accessories." If by "well-appointed accessories", they mean "over-use of tights" then, yes, she is the clear winner.

The Sun believes she dove into an entire wardrobe at once and then ventured out in whatever stuck (what Mr. Smart actually said was: "If I wore all my wardrobe at once, would I get a gong too?" I just jazzed it up a bit), while Mr. Superficial insists GaGa "told her stylist she wanted a giant scrotum on her head." He was almost right. This is clearly an ode to Madonna in the 80s - when lace knickers were "in" in a big way and the Brazilian was but a twinkle in the J. Sisters' eyes.

I believe it signifies Madonna's fuzzy nethers crowning GaGa's head in the year of her birth - that being 1986. The flesh coloured tights represent the birth canal, or perhaps a burst prophylactic, while the stonewash shirt clearly belongs to the "Papa" made reference to in 'Papa Don't Preach' ('I'm keeping ma baby, ooooh, uuuuuh' etc) - which also had a release date in 1986. The bra speaks for itself.

As for the repeated employment of arthritic claws? F*** knows. OH! Madonna's old? I am on FIRE! Honestly, where can one sign up to critique conceptual wankery? 

No, really, if someone could attempt an explanation of why she did the hooky hands outside, before being motivated up the steps by some friendly hoop pushing, only to bust out the hooky hands again once inside, I would be most intrigued to hear suggestions.