All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That Xander off Buffy The Vampire Slayer was tased by LAPD after he took a swing at an officer: "Nicholas Brendon fell short in the slaying department a few hours ago, after he allegedly swung at a couple of cops, and then went on a misguided foot chase. Law enforcement sources tell TMZ they received a call that a drunk man was causing a commotion in Venice, CA. When police responded, sources say Brendon took a swing at cops. We're told Brendon then beat a hasty retreat... He was tased twice, subdued and taken to a hospital. He's currently being booked for felony vandalism - for allegedly damaging some property during the fracas"... What would Willow (before she went evil) and Giles say, Xander?... That Kirsty Gallacher is incensed by suggestions she had her way with Tiger Woods when she was a sports reporter with SKY News: "It was all speculation and it was incorrect. It was very upsetting. I knew I was being talked about and that's why lawyers were involved. But what you do in this job is you get quite strong because you know things will come at you"... That one of Tiger's MANY mistresses, porn star Joslyn James, is releasing her texts from the golfer today on her new website sextingjoslynjames.com... That Tiger's people should consider hiring Xpose's Sean Munsanje to masquerade as the golfer for the coming months, it's the only way the former will be able to resist temptation from the slew of opportunists sure to be flinging themselves at him for the foreseeable... That John and Edward have actually been signed to another record label... This time, Universal is hoping to make a quick book of the back of them... Louis Walsh said: "It's Sony's loss and Universal's gain. F**k 'em! Alarm bells started ringing when Sony signed them to the Arista label. I tried to call them the other day and no-one in the company knew who they were!" (Universal) are the same people behind Cheryl [Cole] and Boyzone, and (therefore used to creating the illusion of talent where there is little) say the boys will be huge. The lads will easily make a million each out of this. I think we can make them big internationally. They are huge over here and still have a massive cult following on YouTube"... That the duos next single is going to be a cover of House of Pain's Jump Around... That's apt... That, when asked what type of man would catch her eye on a beach, Cheryl Cole said during a recent (and agreeably innocuous) interview: "A guy could be in the Speedos and be ripped to within an inch of his life and I don't think I’d look again. It would have to be the Bermuda shorts and the pot belly"... That Michael Lohan suffered a heart attack while travelling from Miami to New York... His current girlfriend said: "His blood pressure skyrocketed. Right now they've told him it looks like he had a minor heart attack but they are still doing tests on him." That Michael was well enough to inform the world when Lindsay got in contact with him: "I got a message from Lindsay which read, 'OMG. Hope you are okay' and my other kids have all been in contact with me too"... That T4's Miquita Oliver has been suspended from the Channel 4 weekend show for saying it how it is at the NME Awards: "Miquita was having a really bad day. She and Ke$ha had a difference of artistic opinion, shall we say, and there was a bit of a misunderstanding. Miquita blurted out the angry words (along the lines of "c***") and thought no-one had heard. She didn't mean anything personally - it was a spur of the moment thing. But Kesha's team caught what she had said and were outraged. They complained to Miquita's bosses and they dealt with her straight away. She was given a serious telling off, and told to take some time off"... A Channel 4 mouthpiece confirmed: "The matter has been dealt with swiftly by T4 and Miquita has sent an apology to those concerned and it has been noted. She will remain a key part of our T4 presenting team and viewers will see her on air as normal over the coming weeks"... That filming of The Tourist had to shut down 'cause an unprecedented amount of bored types turned up to see Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie stand a couple of feet apart from each other (the photos of which you can see at the end of this here gallery)... That Angelina has had to wear that outfit for about three weeks straight at this stage... That Robert Pattinson attended the premiere of his latest film Remember Me in London last night... Lots of girls screamed... That you can see photos from Paddy's Day and what not in Caught Out...

MORE RUMOURS...