All I Know Is That There Were Rumours...

That today's installment of exceptionally grim Rumours includes Jack Tweed; Alex Reid; a bird from Eldorado; Michael Bolton; Lady GaGa; Bono; and Brad Pitt alongside the words "rape", "muder" and "duet"................... That Jack Tweed has been spotted crying in Pentonville as he's afraid of being lynched by prison mates: "Tweed is in a cell on his own, with guards keeping a special eye out in case he is beaten up. It is feared his fame - and the nature of his alleged offence (rape by way of "roasting") - will make him a target"... A friend of Tweed's and his co-accused, Anthony Davis, said: "I can't believe they'd be so dumb. They've got their whole lives ahead of them with privileges most people can only dream about. We're all shocked"... According to The Sun, Davis (who's out on bail),"refused to comment yesterday at his parents' home in nearby Chigwell before speeding away in an Aston Martin"... Tweed had no visitors last night; his mother decided to go visit Jade's graveside instead... In other news involving marginally attractive pig ignorant sorts: Jordan and Alex Reid were part of a scuffle "started by a group of gipsy bare-knuckle fighters who had been drinking all evening" at a cage-fighting night in London called Extreme Brawl... A source said: "One of the fighters fancied his chances and wanted to prove himself by offering Alex outside, which was a stupid thing to do. He said he wanted to fight Alex, and Alex said, 'I'm not being funny, but you've just had your first fight and lost and I've fought some of the best in the world'. He didn't like that answer and the fight started there. The security team were involved. Everyone was grappling with each other. They got everyone outside and some people's shirts came off"... That the marketing team behind Reid's controversial new film must be overjoyed today... News has broke about it featuring a scene centering on a wheelchair bound actress (namely Julie Fernandez from The Office *whispers* and Eldorado) being "dragged from her wheelchair", raped and murdered... A set source said: "Quite how Julie's character is going to be raped and murdered is going to be sorted on the day and depends how far she wants to go"... That's makes a nice change... That Samia Smith, AKA Maria from Corrie, found the body of a 26-year-old man in the back of a van near her home... The "heavily pregnant" soap star discovered the deceased when herself and her husband "had gone to investigate barking coming from inside the vehicle yesterday afternoon"... That Robbie Williams will perform his new single, Bodies, at the ARIA Awards in Sydney... That Brad Pitt has spent in the region of $80k constructing "a bespoke run for his children's gerbils"... That Lady GaGa is to duet with, of all people, Michael Bolton: "I love Michael Bolton, and I always have. The record label called me and said, 'Michael is doing a new album, and who better to write an '80s love song than Lady Gaga?' I said, 'You're absolutely right.' I looked at it as an exciting opportunity, especially after I wrote Just Dance and I was writing for other artists, everybody wanted me to write them the next Just Dance. It was always dance music. It was an exciting opportunity to work with someone as timeless as Michael and do a ballad. Do something that I'm really good at that I don't get to show very much"... Lord, bless Michael Bolton, as the chances of GaGa getting to flash her nethers in the accompanying video is somewhat lessened... That Kim Catrall's Samantha Jones is trying for a baby in the new SATC movie... That Bono is producing a film called The Virgin of Las Vegas, which stars Liam Neeson as "an aging showband star in... Vegas"... That Annie Leibovitz, famed for her controversial shots of John Lennon, Demi Moore, and Mily Cyrus, could lose everything she owns come tomorrow... According to TMZ, she's massively in debt: "In classic Michael Jackson-esque form, Leibovitz sunk deep into debt and then got a loan using her photo catalog (estimated at $40 million) and homes as collateral"... That Sophie Sumner has really moved on since narrowly losing out on the title of Britain's Next Top Model... That you can see what other celebrities are up to in Caught Out...

MORE RUMOURS...