The world according to Tom Cruise: his work is just as 'brutal' as fighting in Afghanistan.

Pfffft, of course 'acting' is just as 'brutal' as live combat. I mean, just look at Johnny Depp here. He's had to borrow his hair off Charlie Sheen such is the stress of it all (as it turns out, Charlie Sheen's hair is in demand; it can deal with the tension given it starred in Platoon, that and it'd probably survive a nuclear holocaust given the amount of drugs its endured).

While we're at it, let's really look at Johnny Depp for a second. Now, far be it for me to insinuate that either have had any *ahems* maintenance, but if they have, Depp should consider going to Tom's guy...

OK, back to Tom and his always entertaining messiah complex. The following comes from TMZ and pretty much speaks for itself. The "legal documents" they speak of pertain to the  $50 million dollar law suit Cruise has taken out against In Touch Magazine for article they published entitled "Abandoned by Daddy. Suri is left heartbroken as Tom suddenly shuts her out of his life and even misses her first day of school. Has he chosen Scientology over Suri for good?!" Yes, it is a very long title. On to TMZ's findings.

"Tom Cruise not only thinks he trains harder than Olympic athletes, he believes his job as a professional actor is as grueling as fighting the war in Afghanistan" - this according to  legal docs obtained by TMZ. As we reported, Cruise recently sat for a deposition in his $50 million libel suit against a magazine publisher that claimed he abandoned daughter Suri - and his quotes are GOLD. First, the Middle East - Tom says his location shoots are just like serving a tour in Afghanistan, 'That’s what it feels like. And certainly on this last movie, it was brutal. It was brutal.' As for his physical training, Tom said, 'There is difficult physical stamina and preparation. Sometimes I’ve spent months, a year, and sometimes two years preparing for a single film.” But the kicker, he adds, 'A sprinter for the Olympics, they only have to run two races a day. When I’m shooting, I could potentially have to run 30, 40 races a day, day after day'."

I reckon if Olympians earned as much money as Tom Cruise reportedly does for running like a constipated meerkat in pretty much every single film he's ever starred in, they'd happily run their arses off til the cows came home.

By the by, Cruise's people have since informed the press at large that his quotes were "taken out of context" and he thinks American troops are aces. His attorney Bert Fields said: "The assertions that Tom Cruise likened making a movie to being at war in Afghanistan is a gross distortion of the record... What Tom said, laughingly, was that sometimes, 'That's what it feels like'. "

Riiiiiiiiight. As you were, soldier.